Carlito: Sorry boys, all the stitches in the world can’t sew me together again. Lay down… lay down. Gonna stretch me out in Fernandez funeral home on Hun and Ninth street. Always knew I’d make a stop there, but a lot later than a whole gang of people thought… Last of the Moh-Ricans… well maybe not the last. Gail’s gonna be a good mom… New improved Carlito Brigante… Hope she uses the money to get out. No room in this city for big hearts like hers… Sorry baby, I tried the best I could, honest… Can’t come with me on this trip, Loaf. Getting the shakes now, last call for drinks, bars closing down… Sun’s out, where are we going for breakfast? Don’t wanna go far. Rough night, tired baby… Tired…
Carlito: If you can’t see the angles no more, you’re in trouble.
Benny Blanco: I don’t know, but there may be some mis-****in’-understanding, I don’t know man, but maybe you don’t remember me, my name is Benny…
Carlito: Maybe I don’t give a ****! Maybe I don’t remember the last time I blew my nose either.
Carlito: Hey lady, I know you.
Gail: Buzz off.
Carlito: Yeah, I know you, you used to go out with that good-looking guy, what was his name again? Oh yeah, Carlito Brigante.
Gail: [turns around] Charlie.
Carlito: Gimme your piece, Dave.
David Kleinfeld: What?
Carlito: Gimme the ****ing gun! Since when are you a tough guy?
Lalin: Look what I got! I mean look at me! You got everything, man! Come on! Look what I got to ****ing go around with, ****ing diapers! I **** my pants everyday! I can’t walk, I can’t hump… you know? Go ahead and kill me, you COCKSUCKER!
Hollywood Nicky: When you take something that’s mine, that offends me. It’s spitting in my face.
Carlito: I’m reloaded! Okay? Come on in here, you mother****ers! Come on, I’m waitin’ for ya! What, you ain’t comin’ in? Okay, I’m comin’ out! Oh, you up against me now, mother****ers! I’m gonna blow your ****in’ brains out! You think you’re big time? You gonna ****in’ die big time! You ready? HERE COMES THE PAIN!
Carlito Brigante: All we gotta do is kill them all and take it all.
Artie Jr.: Get the spic squad in gear and take the ****.
Nacho Reyes: When you have them on the meathook, they will tell you everything.
Carlito: Favor gonna kill you faster than a bullet.
Carlito: If I ever, I mean if I ever see you here again, you die.
Carlito Brigante: No prisoners on this one, just corpses.
Carlito: I’ll tell you something, car rental guys don’t get killed that much.
David Kleinfeld: Hey Louie… Louie, your ****in’ chick’s givin’ you a handjob right in front of everybody. I got guests here, for christsake. People are eating.
Louie: Take it easy, Dave.
David Kleinfeld: No-you take it easy. You got any manners? You wanna **** her, **** her like a normal human being – take her in the bedroom.
Carlito: Who the **** are you? I should remember you? What, you think you like me? You ain’t like me mother****er, you a punk. I’ve been with made people, connected people. Who’ve you been with? Chain snatching, jive-ass, maricon mother****ers. Why don’t you get out of here and go snatch a purse.
Rudy: Mr. Brigante, there is a problem with Mr. Kleinfeld.
Carlito: What kind of problem?
Rudy: He’s in the bathroom ****ing Steffie!
Pachanga: [bursts out laughing]
Carlito: So? What’s the problem? Good for him!
Carlito: No room in this city for big hearts like hers.
Pachanga: Hey, Carlito. Lalin is here. He’s in the office.
Pachanga: Yeah, you wanna see him?
Carlito: You told me he was doin’ thirty years.
Pachanga: Well, I guess he got out!
Carlito: Mi barrio ya no existe.
[My neighborhood doesn’t exist anymore]
Benny Blanco: Hey remember me, Benny Blanco from the Bronx?
Carlito: He’s got a good future if he can live past next week.
Carlito: Right, mother****er? Where’s my money?
Saso: I don’t know!
Carlito: [whips out switchblade] I’LL CUT YOU ****IN’ LIVER OUT!
Saso: Okay! Okay!
Carlito: You a gangster now. You can’t learn it at school… you can’t have a late start.
Carlito: Adiós, counselor.
Carlito: Don’t take me to no hospital, please. ****in’ emergency rooms don’t save nobody. Som-*****es, always pop you at midnight, when all they got is a Chinese intern with a dull spoon.
Carlito: It’s who I am Gail, it’s what I am. Right or wrong, I can’t change that.
Carlito: You think you’re big time? You gonna ****in’ die – big time.
Quisqueya: Your boss is dead and so are you.
[Benny Blanco is being beat up by Pachanga]
Carlito: Take him in the alley!
Carlito: [voice-over] Dumb move, man. Dumb move. But it’s like them old reflexes comin’ back.
Benny Blanco: Hey, my name is Benny Blanco from the Bronx.
Carlito: You know me?
Benny Blanco: Yeah, I know you, you’re Carlito Brigante mother****er to the max, that’s who you are!
Carlito: Well, I don’t know you. So, I don’t owe you, Saso does. My place now, new rules. Everybody pays, okay?
David Kleinfeld: **** you and yer self-righteous code of the goddamn streets.
Carlito: [during his trial] But my time in the Sterling Correctional facilities of Greenhaven and Sing Sing has not been in vain. I’ve been cured; born again, like the Watergaters. I know you’ve heard this rap before, your honor, I’ve changed. I’ve changed, and it didn’t take no thirty years like your honor thought, but only five.
David Kleinfeld: **** you and your self-righteous code of the goddamn streets. Did it pull you out of a 30 year stint in only 5 years? No, it didn’t, I did. Did it get you acquitted 4 ****ing times? No, it didn’t, I did, so **** you, **** the streets, your whole goddamn world is this big, and there’s only one rule, you save your own ass.
[Boarding Kleinfeld’s boat]
Frankie Taglialucci: What’s with the extra guy?
[referring to Carlito]
David Kleinfeld: Carlito, this is one of Tony’s son’s, Frankie.
Frankie Taglialucci: Nah, it’s Frank.
David Kleinfeld: Whatever…
Frankie Taglialucci: NO! What is with the extra guy?
David Kleinfeld: Oh I’m sorry, is this your boat? Shut the **** up, if I wanted help, I brought help.